HOW TO OVERCOME FEAR

HOW TO OVERCOME FEAR

JAMES MZAVER

The average person ranks the fear of public speaking higher than the fear of death. The truth is, this fear could be hurting your professional and personal life.

You may have been there before.

You feel nervous, your palms sweat, your stomach ties itself into knots. You don’t want to do it. You would rather do anything else than talk to someone.

Is this you?

In business, it is essentially important for you to be able to get your point across. It is likely that all of us will one day have to speak in public. Whether we are giving a formal presentation to an audience, or simply asking our boss for a promotion, speaking skills are essential to getting ahead in a professional setting.

The fear of public speaking is very real. However, there are techniques to help you overcome your fears. There are even ways to help harness your energy in a positive way.

Keep reading if you want to know how. . .

1) GET ORGANIZED

When you organize all of your thoughts and materials it helps you to become much more relaxed and calm. When you have clear, organized thoughts it can greatly reduce your speaking anxiety because you can better focus on the one thing at hand, giving a great speech.

This infographic shows some of the most common fears of public speaking.

2) PRACTICE AND PREPARE EXTENSIVELY

Nothing takes the place of practicing and preparing for your speech. Write out a script of your key points, but don’t speak from it word for word. Prepare for your speech so well that you could answer any possible question thrown at you.

3) ELIMINATE FEAR OF REJECTION

“What if my audience hates my speech? What if they boo me off stage?” Try to eliminate all of your fears of rejection. The audience is there to listen to you for a reason.

4) FOCUS ON PATTERNS

When you speak try to get into a rhythm or a flow. Keep you sentences short and to the point and repeat key points. A short pause in between points can add anticipation to what you are going to say next.

5) WATCH YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR

Practice your speech in front of the mirror as if you were speaking directly to someone.

Pay attention to:

• Your facial expressions
• Your gestures
• Your body movements
• How welcoming you appear

When you have gentle expressions and a calm demeanor when you speak, you will be more welcoming to your audience.

6) RECORD YOURSELF AND LEARN YOUR VOICE

Record your speech on your phone or video camera. Record yourself giving the talk from beginning to end. Then listen to it or watch it, and make notes on how you could make it better. Some people do not like listening to the sound of their voice on tape, so it is important that you get used to your own voice and speaking style.

7) WORK ON YOUR BREATHING

When you focus on your breathing your voice will have more resonance and you will relax. Breathe calmly and focus on getting into a rhythm.

8) PRACTICE SOME MORE . . .

When someone asks me how he can build effective communication skills and improve his public speaking, I quote to him the words of Elbert Hubbard, who said, “The only way to learn to speak is to speak and speak, and speak and speak, and speak and speak and speak.”

9) GIVE YOUR SPEECH TO ANOTHER PERSON

There are plenty of people you can practice on. Be sure to tell the person to be completely honest with you in their critique.

Examples of people you can practice on:

• Your significant other
• Your friends
• Your parents
• Your dog . . .

Speaking directly to another person will help relax you and give you experience with getting feedback from someone. If they have questions about your speech, it is likely that members of an audience will have the same questions.

10) PUBLIC SPEAKING CLASSES

Find a great coach or mentor. There are many groups that you can join to learn the art of public speaking. A group such as Toastmasters is non-profit and helps people get over their fears by having them practice speaking on subjects over and over.

11) LIGHTLY EXERCISE BEFORE SPEAKING

Exercising lightly before a presentation can get your blood circulating and send oxygen to your brain. Take a walk before a speech or do a few knee bends.

12) POWERPOINT CAN BE REALLY GREAT, OR REALLY BAD

Sometimes, having a powerpoint can be your best friend. It can help you if you lose your train of thought, keep your audience engaged, and give people a good place to grab notes and main points from.

13) EVEN WARREN BUFFETT HAD PUBLIC SPEAKING ANXIETY AT FIRST

Buffett got over his fears by teaching investing principles to people twice his age. He forced himself to talk to people. He practiced these skills over and over again. Read more about how 

14) SIP WATER THAT’S WARM OR ROOM TEMPERATURE

Sometimes squeezing some lemon into you water helps as well. It helps lubricate your throat. Try to avoid sugary beverages before speaking. These can dry out your mouth and make it harder to talk.

15) READ ELOQUENCE IN PUBLIC SPEAKING BY DR. KENNETH MCFARLAND

McFarland, who passed away in 1985, is also known as the “Dean of American Public Speakers,” and in his book he didn’t talk about methodology or technique at all.

His central message, which influenced me very strongly when I began speaking publicly, was that the key to eloquence is the emotional component that the speaker brings to the subject.

To put it another way, the starting point of being an excellent speaker is for you to really care about your subject.

16) PICK A SUBJECT THAT YOU REALLY CARE ABOUT

How to pick a subject that you really care about:

• The subject should have had an inordinate impact on you
• You want to share it with others
• You intensely feel others could benefit from your knowledge
• You can speak about it from the heart

When you speak about something you passionately care about you will be more comfortable and feel more confident in your element.

17) KNOW 100 WORDS FOR EVERY WORD THAT YOU SPEAK

Ernest Hemingway wrote that, “In order to write well, you must know 10 words about the subject for every word that you write.  Otherwise, the reader will know that this is not true writing.”

I personally feel that, in speaking, you must know 100 words for every word that you speak.  Otherwise, your audience will have the sense that you don’t really know what you’re talking about.

18) FOCUS ON THE MATERIAL, NOT THE AUDIENCE

Focus on delivering your material in the best way possible. Don’t worry about audience reactions.

19) RELAX

When you let go of your stress and relax it eases your body and makes you less tense. Look at #24 for an interesting way that might help you to relax . . .

20) DON’T OVERTHINK AUDIENCE REACTIONS

There is always going to be someone in the audience on their phone or yawning. Remember that there will always be people who are bored or tired. None of these audience reactions have anything to do with you personally.

21) AVOID TALKING TOO FAST

Talking fast during a speech interferes with your breathing patterns. If you talk to fast you will breathe less, and feeling short of breath will make you panicked. Practice slowing down when you speak, and you will be much more calm and relaxed.

22) MAKE YOUR NERVOUS ENERGY WORK FOR YOU

Learn to channel your nervous energy into positive energy. Being nervous is a form of adrenaline. You can use it in a positive way to help give an impassioned presentation.

23) PAY ANY PRICE AND SPEND ANY AMOUNT OF TIME TO SPEAK WELL

Make a decision right now that you want to learn to speak and learn to speak well. Be willing to pay any price and go to any lengths to achieve your goal.

I have seen people leapfrog over others in their careers by overcoming their speaking anxiety. In the long run the better you are and the better you get at it the farther and farther you will go in your business career.

24) MEDITATE 5 MINUTES A DAY

Meditating can help clear your head of negative thoughts. In an article in Forbes, Dan Harris, co-anchor ofNightline and Good Morning America discussed his public speaking anxiety and how meditating for 5 minutes a day helped him to eradicate negative thoughts from his mind.

25) THE TYPICAL COMPENSATION FOR A PUBLIC SPEAKING EVENT IS $4,500 TO $7,500

Public speaking can be a great source of income. Here’s a video I made recently about speaking in 69 countries and how I began public speaking.

27) DEVELOP A PLAN TO IMPROVE YOUR NEXT SPEECH

Practice makes perfect. If there is a video of your speech, watch it and make notes on how you can improve on it for next time.

• How do you think you did?
• Are there areas you think you could have improved?
• Did you seem stiff or make any weird facial expressions?
• Did you use a PowerPoint to your advantage? Did it help?
• Did you use “um” often?
• How was your rhythm?

Write everything down, keep practicing and improving. In time you will banish all of your fears of public speaking.